Among the wilder branches
of pseudoscience to gain popularity during the ‘70s was Kirlian photography,
which supposedly allowed researchers to document emotional reactions from
plants during exposure to stimuli. The folks behind The Kirlian Witness saw an opportunity to create an unusual
thriller, so the hook of their movie is that the only entity present during a
murder besides the killer and the victim is a potted plant, putting the onus on
the victim’s sister to extract incriminating information from the leafy
“witness.” This wacky idea might have made for an offbeat episode of some ’70s
detective show, with Columbo or McCloud offering snide commentary until a surprising
turn of events challenges skepticism. Taken to feature length, the concept
falls apart, especially because the execution of The Kirlian Witness is lifeless. A low-budget indie shot in New
York City, the picture has an attractive photographic style—very high-fashion
telephoto—but the acting is inert, the pacing is deadly, the plotting is muddy,
and the climax features a wannabe-serious scene of a young woman staring at a
potted plant to the accompaniment of atmospheric piano music. Here’s the setup. Laurie
(Nancy Boykin) operates an NYC plant shop with the help of a weird assistant,
Dusty (Ted Le Plat). Both believe in communicating with plants. Laurie’s
sister, Rilla (Nancy Snyder) doesn’t share her belief, and neither does Rilla’s
tempestuous husband, Robert (Joel Colodener). One evening, someone attacks and
kills Laurie. The police rule the death an accident, but Rilla believes
otherwise, so she explores every aspect of her late sister’s life. This prompts
her to discover a copy of The Secret Life
of Plants, the 1973 nonfiction book that helped popularize the idea of
talking to flora. Eventually, her investigation catches the attention of the
killer, sparking new danger. Despite some okay scoring by Henry Mandredini, the movie is so flat that it often
drifts into the realm of accidental self-parody.
The Kirlian Witness: LAME
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